Chin up, Coach. I still love you.

Hey Coach B, I hear you’re feeling a little blue this morning. As in, “We just blue our chance at a perfect season.”
Well, don’t listen to all that nonsense. You’re still Number One in my book.
You probably woke up this morning, gave a stretch, pulled on your cut-off hoodie and stumbled into the kitchen for some Rice Krispies. And if you spilled some milk while pouring it over your cereal, well, that’s okay. No use crying over it.
I can understand if you’re a bit ‘down in the dumps’, so to speak. I mean, you kinda did get humiliated on national TV by getting shown up by an inferior team who was obviously much more prepared than you were. And on the world’s biggest sports stage at that. Oh, and you did kinda, maybe, sorta look like the haughty fool you are by walking off the field with time still left on the clock. And many are saying that you received your just desserts for running up the score on weaker teams game after game.
That’s why I feel it’s necessary to have this little ‘Beli-chat’.
You’re likely reflecting on a season that you’ve viewed as sub-par. Probably thinking that it was a missed opportunity to fulfill destiny and a wasted chance to live up to your team’s potential. A classic choke-job for the ages - one of the biggest collapses in sports history.
And you’d be right about those things. But why focus on the negative?
People like to assign you 'labels'. Petty. Vindictive. Callous. Cold. Insincere. Miserable. Unethical. Dishonest. And those are the kind ones.
But that’s not the Bill Belichick I know. I see through the gruff exterior to the insecure puppy dog that’s just longing to have his ears rubbed. I know you snubbed Tony Dungy after your Week 8 victory because you didn’t want a handshake – you wanted a hug. Those great big Dungy bear hugs are rare commodities and I know you just wanted some of that action.
You pretty much had everyone rooting against you last night. That’s a lot of pressure. At least you came across as humble and polite in your post-game interviews. Oh, you didn’t? Oops.
Then there’s this whole videotaping scandal.
The media pundits, and fans like to throw out terms like ‘Spygate’ and ‘Beli-cheat’. That, I say, is ludicrous. You’ve brought drama and intrigue to the game. And a potential investigation by a special Senate Committee.
But ratings are up because everyone wants to see you fail. Your team has become the most popular in the league. For dubious reasons, but they should be handing you a medal; not a $500,000 fine and a label of being classless. If ya ain’t cheatin’, ya ain’t tryin’, right?
Well Coach, turns out that the tall glass of deceit is half-full. You proved ‘em wrong. Cheaters actually do win.
At least 18 out of 19 times.
So cheer up. It’s not as if the entire sports world outside of Boston wouldn’t just love to see you fall down a well or spontaneously combust or something. No one wants to see you suffer through, oh say, a lifelong ban from the league for cheating. Or be stripped of every award, trophy and accolade you’ve been awarded.
And those who do are just haters, huh? It’s all jealousy. Envy talks a big game.
By the way, I know that the written word doesn’t really lend itself to sarcasm, but Coach, I hope you catch my drift.

Sincerely,

Your biggest fan.